Friday, January 8, 2010

Everyone's having sex, except for me!

That's so unfair!

I went to a Christmas party a few weeks ago, before I knew something might be wrong with my liver. So I was drinking (not much) and since there were underage kids I didn't want to be ridiculous. Anyway, this girl I used to work with asked me to talk to her alone, so we did. And to try and avoid making it super well known who she is, I will just give a short description of our conversation:

She described pain identical to my vulvar pain. I was totally shocked, had I really met someone who had the same problems as me, IN THE FLESH? Someone I could hug and talk to face to face, someone I could see and be with? I know, it's awful I got excited...I don't wish this on anyone, but I was still excited to have someone to talk to. So I gave her all of the information I could, I told her everything I could think of that I've been through, and told her to go to a doctor.

She messaged me a few days ago saying she doesn't have what I do, because penetration was possible. It still hurts, but she doesn't want to see a doctor because she thinks she's just being a baby.

Well, I can't force her to do anything, and I can't do anything about it, it's her choice, so fine. But she's having sex, and I'm not.

THEN tonight my best friend calls me, and she's been living with someone else before she moves in here with me, and she tells me that she's getting some. By some I mean a lot, and yeah it's new to her and exciting and she's never done it until now, but I'm SO jealous.
Only, she asked if it's normal to have pain in the area of your uterus.
No, I'm sorry, but it's not. Ever. Apparently the pain is always there, and I told her that since she's never been to a doctor about any of this stuff she should go now, because it's important.

REGARDLESS.

I am very jealous. And I'm feeling very strange, and I've been having lots of dreams involving lots of sex, is that normal?
I have no doctors calling me, and I've called lots of times. So I'm just totally screwed, still. And I'm waiting on results from my OTHER tests. I'm hormonal and starting birth control again, and I want to have sex.

I need to post things when my brain is clearer than it is right now, sorry.